Lip Service

Fall fashion is a cornucopia of possibilities! Fashion-forward with these simple fash-in tips:

Golden Girl. Just because your beach days are coming to a close doesn’t mean you have lose that healthy sun-kissed glow! Try a self-tanner; we like GlowBaby by Antoneei Giadalalentis (Sephora, $79.99). Make sure you pre-treat for an even application by removing the top seven to ten layers of your skin with an at-home microdermabrasion kit; check out the Smoothsonic DermaCleanse System (saksfifthavenue.com, $399; additional brush heads are $85 each).

Pump It Up! No one looks better taking selfies in the swirling, falling leaves of an oak tree with a tastefully-sweatered date than a lady who’s just had her lips plumped! Collagen injections are getting sexier, safer, and, luckily for us, cheaper– most surgeons offer syringes from $450-600.

It’s Just a Blade. Fall is a great time to think about adding to your nip/tuck honey fund, and it’s never too early to start putting aside some of your allowance for your pre-beach season procedures and recovery. If you let this one slip, you might not find any paws in your honey, girl!

Keep it Shiny! Drier weather means staving off chapped, cracked, un-kissable lips. Try an autismal-flavored lip balm! We like Sephora’s SuperGloss D-Stix® in original flavors like Persimmon Mint Lust and Chocolate Clove Cupcake Thrust ($24.95 each). And never get caught without lip gloss – just think of your favorite Stars Without Makeup photos, if you need a little motivation 😉  Plus, tasting like a cinnamon-dusted pumpkin patch is sure to draw a gentleman in from the frost! Oh!

Search and Destroy. When you’re out with the girls shopping for your new seasonal threads, use fashion itself to snag that gotta-have-it item. If you come across a fellow shopper reaching for that same-sized, dull orange cashmere capelet, be resourceful and slam your stiletto on their closest foot, preferably the bony top side. Don’t be shy — the extra-smalls always go first!

Know the Rules. Understanding the consequences of committing a fashion faux-pas is crucial to building your customized wardrobe. Ignoring the laws can lead you down a path of sadness and injustice — men will never appreciate you if you appear unattractive and women will certainly scoff. With that in mind:

Help Others. Remember that it’s your duty to remind other women of the fashion rules. If you spot another lady erroneously mixing-and-matching any of her clothing items (or shoes! Let’s not forget shoes!), be sure to gently inform her of her mistake by telling her something like, “Nice jeans” in a snide tone or try an underhanded compliment — these skills pay for themselves. 😉

Keep It Simple, Stupid! If you’re sexy enough to have one, ask your man if your outfit is hot enough! After all, that’s what it’s really all about!

Set Goals. Accepting that your body has unfixable flaws and deformities that no combination of clothing can hide is the first step toward becoming a fashionista. You can learn to camouflage your weak spots by following these and other Lip Tips. And, even when you think you’re looking your best, there will always be another woman in stilettos ready to stomp you back into Fuglytown. Be prepared and keep reading Lip Service!

Most importantly, remember to have fun!

Tags: #costume, #Fall, #Halloween, #halloweencostume, #PSL, #pumpkinspicelatte, #sexycostume, #sexyhalloweencostume